CALABASAS, Calif., Dec. 18, 2017 (GLOBE NEWSWIRE) -- As the holidays approach, Family Law Attorney Maya Shulman cautions couples to watch out for ten common relationship pitfalls that almost always break up relationships or end in divorce. While the 10 may be omnipresent all year, as the festivities approach, expectations demand a celebratory mood which can trigger tension and emotion – like no other time of year.  Attorney Shulman created The 10 Pitfalls list after observing common patterns in couples who have chosen to divorce.

Attorney Maya Shulman, an AV-Preeminent-rated attorney, is the founder of the Shulman Family Law Group with offices in Santa Barbara and Calabasas, California. Ms. Shulman is known for her expertise in interstate and international family formations and dissolutions, including divorce, custody, adoption, paternity matters, assisted reproduction technologies (ART), and surrogacy contracts.

“These days,” says Maya, “there is a common theme in couples where, when a problem exists, many find it easier to divorce rather than working on improving the relationship. However, divorce should always be the last resort. In my Family Law practice, I often encourage couples to try to resolve their differences, if they are willing, rather than walking away from their relationships. Here are the 10 most common pitfalls of a relationship that is failing:

1. Couples stop having conversations. Not making small talk is the first sign of a relationship in trouble.

2. Couples find excuses to spend time apart.

3. One or both of the parties make their children the solitary focus of the relationship.

4.  There is no emotional investment between made between the parties and the trust is broken.   

5. One or both parties stop respecting one another for their achievements or other meaningful involvements or interests.

6. An inequity develops between the two causing an imbalance. This can be due to monetary, intellectual or spiritual growth that is not shared.

7.  There is no longer an effort made to “date” or share time together outside the home. This is critical and non-negotiable. Couples must explore new experiences together, even couples who have been together a long time.

8. An element of surprise is necessary to keep the relationship growing and glowing. Together, couples should explore seeing and doing new things.

9. There is a lack of intimacy in the relationship. When the intimacy dies, so does the relationship.  Couples must continue to have sex lovingly and frequently and remind themselves of the time when they could not keep their hands off each other.

10. Someone is holding a grudge. Couples must learn to forgive, accept and evolve together.  Being married is about being yourself except with someone else.

“The holidays create expectations for intimacy and romance which can put further pressure on the troubled relationship,” says Maya. “It’s hard to compare your relationship with a picture-perfect Hallmark card: Most people think they should be happy and experiencing togetherness at this time of year, but if your partner is ignoring you, it can bring everything to a head at an inopportune moment.

“My advice to anyone experiencing these is to not give up. In many cases, making a little more effort can save a relationship that from failing.”

Recognized as a Super Lawyer in Southern California, Maya is the founder of The Shulman Family Law Group, which provides litigation and mediation services in family law in Los Angeles, Ventura, and Santa Barbara counties. 

A frequent media commentator, Maya has written about California’s controversial “separate and apart” separation ruling in Davis and SB 1255, international adoption and confidentiality in celebrity divorces. She is a contributing author to Strategies for Family Law in California, 2015 ed.: Leading Lawyers on Understanding Developments in California Family Law (Inside the Minds).

A member of the American Bar Association and the Family Law Sections of the Ventura County, Los Angeles County and San Fernando Valley Bar Associations, Maya speaks several languages and has a significant interstate and international client portfolio.

For media inquiries, please contact:

Maya Shulman, Shulman Family Law Group

800 230-1770 or info@shulmanfamilylawgroup.us

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